The Road to Germany 2006 - Part I (published Aug06)

The World Cup may be over for another 4 years but this time around we were lucky enough to be invited (by people in “high places” and with connections) to see our first ever World Cup match live – England’s second round match-up versus Ecuador. All we needed to do was show up in Stuttgart for the game. Five days before however, things did not look pretty. There were no direct flights and the few non-direct flights to Stuttgart were exorbitantly expensive, no doubt because of the World Cup. With no hotels being available either, I became discouraged, and began thinking it wasn’t really worth the hassle… until Sele said to me “why don’t we drive to Germany?” I’m like huh? Are you off your head or what? You and who will drive to Germany? But then he mentioned that a colleague at work does London to Cologne in 6 hours all the time. A friend from University lives in Cologne and had already invited us over despite the match being in Stuttgart. I had a quick look at the map of Germany online, and Cologne was on the way to Stuttgart…well sort of anyway! I called up one of my boys who had driven to France a few times and asked him all the necessary questions:- Can we use our UK licenses in Europe? How do we cross the channel? What side of the road do they drive on in Europe?

Got home that Tuesday night and my housemate suggested we invested in a GPS to help us navigate the European roads. We ordered it on Wednesday and received it on Thursday. On Friday, went to pick up our match tickets and had a chance to test out the GPS. Wow, my days of reading A-Z’s may well be over. On the way back home it went dead, but I wasn’t worried – charging it up overnight would not be a problem.

So here is a recount of our European adventure, driving across the continent – I know what you’re thinking – we must be ardent England fans to go such great lengths to watch the game live, right? Well, the truth is (and we only discovered the full extent of this in hindsight), you don’t get gifted Sky Box tickets to see a World Cup match on your home continent and not go because you can’t afford a flight! We may have won the match, but the game certainly wasn’t the highlight of our trip:- Saturday 24th June 6.25am – We leave the Docklands to catch the Euro tunnel train at 7.58am. We say a short prayer before leaving – neither of us has ever driven on the other side of the road, so the journey ahead of us seems quite daunting - obviously we are worried that we won’t be able to hack it or understand the signs. Plus, Sele has hardly done any motorway driving before, so it is very likely that I am going to have to drive the whole trip.
7.25am – We arrive at Folkestone, where the Euro tunnel departs from. We are handled pretty roughly at customs. They seize our passports, ask us to step out of the car and ask all sorts of questions – “Do you own the car? Are you carrying any weapons, or explosives?” What sort of profiling is this, we thought – they are letting everyone else through… They are about to start searching the car when our passports come back clean, so they send us on our way.
7.45am – We board the Euro tunnel train and we’re getting ready to depart. We’re still praying for journey mercies! This is all new territory you know and quite exciting too…we’re calling and texting our loved ones like there’s no tomorrow…
9.29am (local time) – Arrival in Calais. We hit the highway straight away to get to Cologne in 6 hours. Bambo has a bet on at work (friendly bet, no money involved!) that we can do London to Cologne within 6 hours.10.15am – Our plan to get cheaper petrol on the continent fails as we find to our dismay that it costs about 140 cents per litre – not much different from the UK. 11.10am – We arrive in Brussels less than 4 hours after leaving home. Not bad. Cologne is only 2 hours away, and satisfied that we could have made the whole trip within 6 hours, we decide to relax and enjoy the ride. It occurs to Bambo that we’re going to pass close to Maastricht enroute to Cologne and that Fola’s people are there, so we decide to pay them an impromptu visit. After calling Fola to get the address and phone number, we turn on the GPS to get us to Maastricht. 12.16am – It all starts to go wrong. The GPS goes dead after just 30 minutes. We stop to ask for directions from a guy who doesn’t speak English! Bambo’s French may be lousy, but he understands just enough to get us to Maastricht.
12.40pm – We can’t find the way to Fola’s house so we hang out in the town centre and soak up the culture while waiting for a cab to take us there. The weather is great and you can feel the World Cup fever here – the Dutch expect their team to do very well at this World Cup. 2.30pm – We eventually get there and hang out with his brother, whilst recharging the GPS and phones. We work out that we have to leave by 4pm to get to Cologne in time to watch the Germany vs Sweden game on German soil (kick-off 5pm). We don’t have tickets and it’s not even being played in Cologne, but we reckon that the atmosphere should be electric, being in the host country of the World Cup while their team is playing!
3.00pm – Fola’s parents get home, and it’s great to see them before we leave. They obviously want to feed us before we hit the road, but awkwardly, we tell them that we are fasting (remember that the whole church fasted for the month of June), and it’s not that we want to be impolite. They are very understanding and give us lots of food for the road!
3.45pm – We depart for Cologne. By this time we’ve resorted to “GPS rationing”, that is, only to be turned on if absolutely necessary. 4.35pm – The GPS saves us after getting lost twice! It should now be smooth sailing from here! We’ve just crossed the border into Germany! 4.45pm – Apparently there is no speed limit on the German Autobahn. We’re doing 100mph at one point, but a few cars are whizzing past us at speeds no less than 150mph! That’s just crazy insane! We later discover that these German highways with limitless speeds are of almost mythical fame.5.05pm – Just as we are approaching Cologne, the GPS goes dead again! Imagine approaching London on the motorway without knowing which exit to take! 6.30pm – After driving round Cologne aimlessly for over an hour, we stop at yet another fuel station to ask for directions to Richard Wagner Strabe (Street). Miraculously, it is only 5 minutes away! Angie picks us up and we go to a bar to catch the dying minutes of the Germany game. Jubilant scenes on the streets afterwards show an excitement about the German team not seen for many years. 10.00pm – After catching the start of the Argentina Mexico game, we head off to a party with our hosts. Sunday 26th June 11.30am – We set out to Stuttgart, knowing that it will take at least 3 hours to get there. Kick-off for the England game is 5pm. We want to get there well ahead of time to enjoy the atmosphere. Nothing much to report on this trip, we start reading the road signs better and don’t need to turn on the GPS.
3.00pm – We arrive at the stadium in Stuttgart and make our way to the Sky Box with our hospitality passes, where we finally meet the guys who got us the tickets. We could go on and on about the VIP treatment we received, but we won’t……let’s just say, “If Carlsberg showed hospitality…”
5.00pm – Match kicks off.
5.45pm - We catch a glimpse of Victoria Beckham at half-time, who has reserved the Sky Box next to ours. We are very very grateful that we can stop “waiting” at 6pm, because it would have been a shame not to be able to sample the buffet and enjoy the first class service in the Sky Box! Everyone else had got stuck in well before kick-off!6.16pm – Bend it like Beckham. The only real moment of quality during the game. 6.50pm – Everyone has realised that the match winner’s wife will be walking past us at full-time. Cue some shameful paparazzi style behaviour. They say if you can’t beat them….. 6.55pm – We have dinner at the stadium after the game before heading back to Cologne. 8.30pm – As we are about to leave Stuttgart, a huge storm breaks out. We try to turn on the GPS but it goes dead immediately. At this point we realise that perhaps the mains adaptor doesn’t recharge the batteries after all….
9.00pm – We eventually get on the highway – it has no lights and the visibility is really poor. It’s absolutely pouring and for the first time in my life, I find myself driving for survival, and not to get to my destination asap. I can’t even see 20 metres ahead of me and I’m really worried that we’re going to have an accident, and we’re moving along at a snails pace………

How are we ever going to make it back to Cologne in pitch darkness, terrible weather, no map and no GPS, and driving at 30mph? Find out next month, in the final instalment of the Road to Germany…….